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Warning: Table './active5_foxes/watchdog' is marked as crashed and should be repaired query: INSERT INTO watchdog (uid, type, message, variables, severity, link, location, referer, hostname, timestamp) VALUES (0, 'php', '%message in %file on line %line.', 'a:4:{s:6:\"%error\";s:12:\"user warning\";s:8:\"%message\";s:1623:\"Table './active5_foxes/cache_filter' is marked as crashed and should be repaired\nquery: UPDATE cache_filter SET data = '<p class=\\"rtecenter\\" style=\\"\\"><a href=\\"http://www.facebook.com/CatchingFoxes\\" target=\\"_blank\\"><img alt=\\"\\" src=\\"/sites/www.catchingfoxes.com/files/resize/social/facebook-64x64.png\\" style=\\"text-align: center; width: 64px; height: 64px; \\" width=\\"64\\" height=\\"6 in /home/active5/public_html/drupal6_multisite/includes/database.mysql.inc on line 135

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Warning: Table './active5_foxes/watchdog' is marked as crashed and should be repaired query: INSERT INTO watchdog (uid, type, message, variables, severity, link, location, referer, hostname, timestamp) VALUES (0, 'php', '%message in %file on line %line.', 'a:4:{s:6:\"%error\";s:12:\"user warning\";s:8:\"%message\";s:537:\"Table './active5_foxes/cache_filter' is marked as crashed and should be repaired\nquery: UPDATE cache_filter SET data = '<div class=\\"fb-like\\" data-font=\\"verdana\\" data-href=\\"http://www.facebook.com/CatchingFoxes\\" data-send=\\"false\\" data-show-faces=\\"true\\" data-width=\\"280\\">\\n  </div>\\n', created = 1566053507, expire = 1566139907, headers = '', serialized = 0 WHERE cid = '2:854065b9b61ff8596 in /home/active5/public_html/drupal6_multisite/includes/database.mysql.inc on line 135

Warning: Table './active5_foxes/watchdog' is marked as crashed and should be repaired query: INSERT INTO watchdog (uid, type, message, variables, severity, link, location, referer, hostname, timestamp) VALUES (0, 'php', '%message in %file on line %line.', 'a:4:{s:6:\"%error\";s:12:\"user warning\";s:8:\"%message\";s:224:\"Table './active5_foxes/cache_filter' is marked as crashed and should be repaired\nquery: SELECT data, created, headers, expire, serialized FROM cache_filter WHERE cid = '2:602129485ebf5bee3ed24f212c66412c'\";s:5:\"%file\";s:62:\"/home/active5/public_html/drupal6_multisite/includes/cache.inc\";s:5:\"%line\";i:25;}', 3, '', 'http://www.catchingfoxes.com/content/out-third-row', '', '100.25.39.138', 1566053507) in /home/active5/public_html/drupal6_multisite/includes/database.mysql.inc on line 135

Warning: Table './active5_foxes/watchdog' is marked as crashed and should be repaired query: INSERT INTO watchdog (uid, type, message, variables, severity, link, location, referer, hostname, timestamp) VALUES (0, 'php', '%message in %file on line %line.', 'a:4:{s:6:\"%error\";s:12:\"user warning\";s:8:\"%message\";s:843:\"Table './active5_foxes/cache_filter' is marked as crashed and should be repaired\nquery: UPDATE cache_filter SET data = '<SCRIPT charset=\\"utf-8\\" type=\\"text/javascript\\" src=\\"http://ws.amazon.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&MarketPlace=US&ID=V20070822/US/catcfoxe-20/8001/c4b856b2-bfce-458b-87a4-a444c961a0b1\\"> </script><p><NOSCRIPT><A HREF=\\"http://ws.amazon.com/widgets/q?ServiceVersion=20070822&MarketPlace=US&ID=V in /home/active5/public_html/drupal6_multisite/includes/database.mysql.inc on line 135

Warning: Table './active5_foxes/watchdog' is marked as crashed and should be repaired query: INSERT INTO watchdog (uid, type, message, variables, severity, link, location, referer, hostname, timestamp) VALUES (0, 'php', '%message in %file on line %line.', 'a:4:{s:6:\"%error\";s:12:\"user warning\";s:8:\"%message\";s:224:\"Table './active5_foxes/cache_filter' is marked as crashed and should be repaired\nquery: SELECT data, created, headers, expire, serialized FROM cache_filter WHERE cid = '2:132a8457abcc78748ef29251eaa8f1d7'\";s:5:\"%file\";s:62:\"/home/active5/public_html/drupal6_multisite/includes/cache.inc\";s:5:\"%line\";i:25;}', 3, '', 'http://www.catchingfoxes.com/content/out-third-row', '', '100.25.39.138', 1566053507) in /home/active5/public_html/drupal6_multisite/includes/database.mysql.inc on line 135

Warning: Table './active5_foxes/watchdog' is marked as crashed and should be repaired query: INSERT INTO watchdog (uid, type, message, variables, severity, link, location, referer, hostname, timestamp) VALUES (0, 'php', '%message in %file on line %line.', 'a:4:{s:6:\"%error\";s:12:\"user warning\";s:8:\"%message\";s:842:\"Table './active5_foxes/cache_filter' is marked as crashed and should be repaired\nquery: UPDATE cache_filter SET data = '<p><strong>Catch for us the foxes, the little foxes that ruin the vineyards, our vineyards that are in bloom. </strong><br /><em>Song of Solomon 2:15 NIV</em></p>\\n<p>Metaphorically, the "foxes" are the damaging attitudes and actions that can creep in and threaten the love relationship of a couple and a home.  Catching Foxes in /home/active5/public_html/drupal6_multisite/includes/database.mysql.inc on line 135

Warning: Table './active5_foxes/watchdog' is marked as crashed and should be repaired query: INSERT INTO watchdog (uid, type, message, variables, severity, link, location, referer, hostname, timestamp) VALUES (0, 'php', '%message in %file on line %line.', 'a:4:{s:6:\"%error\";s:12:\"user warning\";s:8:\"%message\";s:224:\"Table './active5_foxes/cache_filter' is marked as crashed and should be repaired\nquery: SELECT data, created, headers, expire, serialized FROM cache_filter WHERE cid = '2:fe7b2055d10a2c25c439ca4710d86502'\";s:5:\"%file\";s:62:\"/home/active5/public_html/drupal6_multisite/includes/cache.inc\";s:5:\"%line\";i:25;}', 3, '', 'http://www.catchingfoxes.com/content/out-third-row', '', '100.25.39.138', 1566053507) in /home/active5/public_html/drupal6_multisite/includes/database.mysql.inc on line 135

Warning: Table './active5_foxes/watchdog' is marked as crashed and should be repaired query: INSERT INTO watchdog (uid, type, message, variables, severity, link, location, referer, hostname, timestamp) VALUES (0, 'php', '%message in %file on line %line.', 'a:4:{s:6:\"%error\";s:12:\"user warning\";s:8:\"%message\";s:392:\"Table './active5_foxes/cache_filter' is marked as crashed and should be repaired\nquery: UPDATE cache_filter SET data = '<p><a href=\\"mailto:kim@catchingfoxes.com\\">kim@catchingfoxes.com</a></p>\\n', created = 1566053507, expire = 1566139907, headers = '', serialized = 0 WHERE cid = '2:fe7b2055d10a2c25c439ca4710d86502'\";s:5:\"%file\";s:62:\"/home/active5/public_html/drupal6_multisite/includes/cache.inc\";s:5:\"%line\";i:108;}', 3, � in /home/active5/public_html/drupal6_multisite/includes/database.mysql.inc on line 135
Out of the Third Row | Catching Foxes
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  • user warning: Table './active5_foxes/cache_filter' is marked as crashed and should be repaired query: UPDATE cache_filter SET data = '<p class=\"rtecenter\"><img alt=\"\" src=\"http://www.catchingfoxes.com/sites/www.catchingfoxes.com/files/resize/blog/Pew-469x312.jpg\" style=\"border-top-width: 5px; border-right-width: 5px; border-bottom-width: 5px; border-left-width: 5px; border-top-style: solid; border-right-style: solid; border-bottom-style: solid; border-left-style: solid; margin-left: 10px; margin-right: 10px; margin-top: 10px; margin-bottom: 10px; width: 469px; height: 312px; \" title=\"\" width=\"469\" height=\"312\" /><span style=\"font-size:16px;\"><span style=\"font-family: \'comic sans ms\', cursive; \"><i>&nbsp;</i></span></span></p>\n<p class=\"rteleft\"><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><i>I walked into church smelling like Bath and Body. &nbsp;I made my way to the third row on the left. My family moaned, &quot;Can&#39;t we sit somewhere else?&quot; &nbsp;</i></span></p>\n<p class=\"rteleft\"><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><i>They pointed out that we had sat in the third row on the left for ten years in two different churches. &nbsp;I smiled, ignored them, and took my seat. &nbsp;</i></span></p>\n<p class=\"rteleft\"><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><i><span style=\"color: rgb(139, 69, 19); \">I noticed her directly in front of me </span>and since I knew some of her story, I leaned forward and politely asked of her recent hospital stay. &nbsp;As she updated me on the progression of the cancer into her lungs I pulled back slightly, her suffering too raw. She represented a world I could not comprehend: black, inner city, sexual exploitation, and addiction. &nbsp;And now, a diagnosis of cancer just as she had begun to seek out a new life. &nbsp;I patted her shoulder. &nbsp;</i></span></p>\n<p class=\"rteleft\"><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><i>A worship song started. &nbsp;I was rescued.</i></span></p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><font class=\"Apple-style-span\"><i>After a few songs, <span style=\"color: rgb(139, 69, 19); \">I sensed that she was crying</span>. &nbsp;During previous songs, she had been clapping, singing, raising her hands in praise. When I realized she was upset, I reached a hand of comfort to her shoulder. &nbsp;It was meant as a sign of love, but it also kept me an arm&#39;s distance from her pain. &nbsp;</i></font></span></p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><font class=\"Apple-style-span\"><i>My eyes glanced down the row. A fellow worshipper caught my eye and motioned with his hand for me to go around to stand next to the weeping soul. &nbsp;As I did, and she sensed my nearness, she almost collapsed into my arms.</i></font></span></p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><font class=\"Apple-style-span\"><i>I had never had an adult woman cling to me and sob so hard. &nbsp;The words in the song seemed to give her permission to feel the pain, suffering and brokenness of her life. &nbsp;I was not comfortable. &nbsp;I didn&#39;t know what to do to &quot;fix&quot; this for her. &nbsp;</i></font></span></p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><font class=\"Apple-style-span\"><i>Still holding her with my left arm, <span style=\"color: rgb(139, 69, 19); \">I put my right hand up on her face and head to cradle her</span>. &nbsp;I wiped her tears with my thumb; stroked her cheek. The more intimate my touch, the harder she sobbed. &nbsp;My own breath caught in my own throat. &nbsp;My own chest heaved a sob of sympathy. To hold such brokenness against my chest ripped it wide open.</i></font></span></p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><font class=\"Apple-style-span\"><i>Worship continued, &quot;If your heart is broken..... just lift your hands and say....I know that I can make it....&quot; &nbsp;<span style=\"color: rgb(139, 69, 19); \">I realized she didn&#39;t need me to fix anything</span>, but just to help her worship. &nbsp;</i></font></span></p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><font class=\"Apple-style-span\"><i>I had never raised my hand in worship. Her delicate black hand in mine, raised in the air, is something I will never forget. &nbsp;Without words, with our simple gesture, she testified her faith in Jesus would carry her through. &nbsp;</i></font></span></p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><font class=\"Apple-style-span\"><i>As we sang the song a second time, her sobs increased, but so did her grip on my hand above our heads. &nbsp;I think this is how I would like to picture a Christian&#39;s walk - giving testimony to Christ&#39;s sufficiency in the gentlest way possible through the moments of deepest pain.</i></font></span></p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><i><i>I walked out of church smelling like cigarette smoke. &nbsp;Holding her had replaced my body spray with her scent, and it lingered on my shirt. &nbsp;</i></i></span></p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><i><i><span style=\"color: rgb(139, 69, 19); \">I liked the reminder of her pain entrusted to me.</span>&nbsp;&nbsp;</i></i></span></p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><i><i>Her weakness, her transparency, her need, her cigarette smell - she shattered my Christian facade. By letting me scoop her brokenness into my arms, she revealed the similarity of our hearts. &nbsp;That revelation cost me everything. &nbsp;</i></i></span></p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size:14px;\"><i><i>I had to move out of the third row.</i></i></span></p>\n', created = 1566053507, expire = 1566139907, headers = '', serialized = 0 WHERE cid = '2:b6cd8b57f20ac7316cadf2a4f93cf972' in /home/active5/public_html/drupal6_multisite/includes/cache.inc on line 108.
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  • user warning: Table './active5_foxes/cache_filter' is marked as crashed and should be repaired query: UPDATE cache_filter SET data = '<p class=\"rtecenter\" style=\"\"><a href=\"http://www.facebook.com/CatchingFoxes\" target=\"_blank\"><img alt=\"\" src=\"/sites/www.catchingfoxes.com/files/resize/social/facebook-64x64.png\" style=\"text-align: center; width: 64px; height: 64px; \" width=\"64\" height=\"64\" /></a><a href=\"http://pinterest.com/kimmrankin/\" target=\"_blank\"><img alt=\"\" src=\"/sites/www.catchingfoxes.com/files/resize/social/big-p-button-64x64.png\" style=\"width: 64px; height: 64px; \" width=\"64\" height=\"64\" /></a><a href=\"mailto:kim@catchingfoxes.com\" target=\"_blank\"><img alt=\"\" src=\"/sites/www.catchingfoxes.com/files/resize/social/mail-64x64.png\" style=\"width: 64px; height: 64px; \" width=\"64\" height=\"64\" /></a><a href=\"http://www.catchingfoxes.com/rss.xml\" target=\"_blank\"><img alt=\"\" src=\"/sites/www.catchingfoxes.com/files/resize/social/rss-64x64.png\" style=\"width: 64px; height: 64px; \" width=\"64\" height=\"64\" /></a></p>\n', created = 1566053507, expire = 1566139907, headers = '', serialized = 0 WHERE cid = '2:48be9f28bc948ea32b70445d0a590c98' in /home/active5/public_html/drupal6_multisite/includes/cache.inc on line 108.
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  • user warning: Table './active5_foxes/cache_filter' is marked as crashed and should be repaired query: UPDATE cache_filter SET data = '<p><strong>Catch for us the foxes, the little foxes that ruin the vineyards, our vineyards that are in bloom. </strong><br /><em>Song of Solomon 2:15 NIV</em></p>\n<p>Metaphorically, the &quot;foxes&quot; are the damaging attitudes and actions that can creep in and threaten the love relationship of a couple and a home. &nbsp;Catching Foxes is committed to being a resource as you guard against the things that might injure and destroy the harvest you are striving to grow in your home.</p>\n', created = 1566053507, expire = 1566139907, headers = '', serialized = 0 WHERE cid = '2:132a8457abcc78748ef29251eaa8f1d7' in /home/active5/public_html/drupal6_multisite/includes/cache.inc on line 108.
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Out of the Third Row

Submitted by kim on Thu, 10/04/2012 - 18:25 in Lessons for Mom

 

I walked into church smelling like Bath and Body.  I made my way to the third row on the left. My family moaned, "Can't we sit somewhere else?"  

They pointed out that we had sat in the third row on the left for ten years in two different churches.  I smiled, ignored them, and took my seat.  

I noticed her directly in front of me and since I knew some of her story, I leaned forward and politely asked of her recent hospital stay.  As she updated me on the progression of the cancer into her lungs I pulled back slightly, her suffering too raw. She represented a world I could not comprehend: black, inner city, sexual exploitation, and addiction.  And now, a diagnosis of cancer just as she had begun to seek out a new life.  I patted her shoulder.  

A worship song started.  I was rescued.

After a few songs, I sensed that she was crying.  During previous songs, she had been clapping, singing, raising her hands in praise. When I realized she was upset, I reached a hand of comfort to her shoulder.  It was meant as a sign of love, but it also kept me an arm's distance from her pain.  

My eyes glanced down the row. A fellow worshipper caught my eye and motioned with his hand for me to go around to stand next to the weeping soul.  As I did, and she sensed my nearness, she almost collapsed into my arms.

I had never had an adult woman cling to me and sob so hard.  The words in the song seemed to give her permission to feel the pain, suffering and brokenness of her life.  I was not comfortable.  I didn't know what to do to "fix" this for her.  

Still holding her with my left arm, I put my right hand up on her face and head to cradle her.  I wiped her tears with my thumb; stroked her cheek. The more intimate my touch, the harder she sobbed.  My own breath caught in my own throat.  My own chest heaved a sob of sympathy. To hold such brokenness against my chest ripped it wide open.

Worship continued, "If your heart is broken..... just lift your hands and say....I know that I can make it...."  I realized she didn't need me to fix anything, but just to help her worship.  

I had never raised my hand in worship. Her delicate black hand in mine, raised in the air, is something I will never forget.  Without words, with our simple gesture, she testified her faith in Jesus would carry her through.  

As we sang the song a second time, her sobs increased, but so did her grip on my hand above our heads.  I think this is how I would like to picture a Christian's walk - giving testimony to Christ's sufficiency in the gentlest way possible through the moments of deepest pain.

I walked out of church smelling like cigarette smoke.  Holding her had replaced my body spray with her scent, and it lingered on my shirt.  

I liked the reminder of her pain entrusted to me.  

Her weakness, her transparency, her need, her cigarette smell - she shattered my Christian facade. By letting me scoop her brokenness into my arms, she revealed the similarity of our hearts.  That revelation cost me everything.  

I had to move out of the third row.